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Aw, look how happy we are! That’s pure wedded bliss right there. Would you believe us if we told you we were in marriage counseling less than a year after this picture was taken? Marriage is hard, y’all. In fact—in case no one has told you—the first year is especially hard. Everyone’s experience is different, of course, but many newlyweds soon realize that “the honeymoon is over” as soon as the literal honeymoon is over (or, in our case, before it’s over since we had our first Category-5-disaster-level fight on our honeymoon).
Many of you may be surprised by this, or just surprised that we’d admit it—something others may deem shocking or shameful, especially in the modern age of perfectly curated social media lives. However, in admitting that we’ve struggled, that we still struggle and sometimes need help, it’s not shame we find but freedom. It’s exhausting pretending that everything is fine all the time, isn’t it? Real life is not fine all the time, and that’s OK. Our first year of marriage was rocky, but we not only got through it, but we also grew stronger because of it. We learned a lot about ourselves and each other. We learned how to communicate, set boundaries, manage expectations—all great skills that we’re still honing today—because, of course, the first year wasn’t the only rocky one. (Marriage is hard, y’all, remember?) Rocky or not, each one of our soon-to-be-20 years together has been better than the last, and we’re grateful for every single one.
Stay tuned to read the next chapter of our little story in the fall issue publishers’ note.
May the Lord bless and keep you.
Scott and Meredith Tredeau
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