The writing muse finds people in different ways. For some, it’s a lifelong nudge to apply words to experiences. For others, it’s a serendipitous encounter or even a simple love for language itself. For Joe Dipierro, it was a beautiful blonde German with deep hazel eyes and a desire to leave his children and grandchildren the story of their 63 years together.
Dipierro met his future wife, Hiltrud, at a friend’s house in 1961, when he was a 21-year-old soldier stationed in Kaiserslautern, Germany. He remembers the details vividly.
“We met on Oct. 15 at 6:28 in the evening,” Dipierro said. “It was a Sunday. She was babysitting for a friend of mine who lived in town, and he told me I should come over to meet someone.” Dipierro admits it was probably not the best timing, as he and another friend had spent the day sampling new wines at a festival in a nearby village. “It was love at first sight on my end but probably not hers,” he said, “but I persisted.”
Dipierro jokes that Hiltrud spoke better English than he did, as he had grown up as a farmer’s son in rural New Jersey. She worked as a trilingual document translator for a German rail system in an area where American and French forces were stationed. She was just 18 years old when they met, and her family had difficulty accepting their relationship at first. As was common for German families post-WWII, feelings toward Americans were complicated, and they were not eager for their daughters to marry foreigners who would likely take them overseas. When Hiltrud’s family invited Dipierro over for Sunday dinner, he arrived with a big bouquet of flowers for her mom.
"It was love at first sight on my end but probably not hers." — Joe Dipierro
“That broke the ice very well,” he said. The couple were engaged after about six months and married a year later—on Hiltrud’s 19th birthday. “We lived there until July 1964,” Dipierro said. “We went back and forth to Germany several times during my military career. I did a total of nine years in Germany during my 22 years of service.” Dipierro joined the Army right after graduating from high school. “Several of my friends and I talked about joining the Army together and getting our obligation out of the way instead of waiting to be drafted, but when the day came, they all changed their minds,” he said. “I decided to go anyway, with the intent of doing three years and getting out. I ended up liking it and decided to stay in.”
The hard-working Dipierro impressed his leaders, joining as a private and rising to the rank of major by the time of retirement. He does not know for certain, but he suspects he was one of the fastest-promoted artillery soldiers at the time. As he wrote in his memoir, “It had taken me exactly 32 months … to go from pay grade E-1 (Private) to pay grade E-6 (Staff Sergeant). At that time, the normal progression from E-1 to E-6 was 10 to 12 years.” At the urging of a second lieutenant friend, he applied to Officer Candidate School and was accepted despite not having a college degree. Dipierro later would earn a degree in history and enjoys telling people that it “only” took him 15 years to do so. Of course, he had to fit his studies around a busy military career that included two deployments to Vietnam. On his first tour in 1966, he frequently came under fire while overseeing ammunition-restocking missions. His second tour was in 1970, when he served as an advisor to South Vietnamese General Minh’s operations staff.
The Dipierros had three daughters, Sandy, Diana and Michelle, whom he calls “magnificent” and “perfect in their own ways” in his book. After retiring from the military in 1981, the family settled back in New Jersey. Their daughters were teenagers at the time, and Dipierro wanted to be physically with his family more than a military career could allow. He explored different career paths after retirement, always with Hiltrud’s full support while she worked for a bank. Dipierro owned a carpet cleaning business for a while, then worked in security before applying for a range officer position at Fort Dix, New Jersey. He admits he wishes he had stayed with that job but decided to work in finance for a while before moving on to a career in real estate. Doing so required attending multiple mayoral and council meetings, where he realized their small town was terribly disorganized. A friend suggested that Dipierro run for mayor.
“I had never considered running for any political office,” he said with a laughing before sharing Hiltrud’s pragmatic opinion. “She said, ‘Why not? You’re not doing anything important anyway.’”
On Jan. 1, 1996, Joe Dipierro was sworn in as the mayor of Jamesburg, New Jersey. A few days later, the Blizzard of 1996 buried the state in snow. One of his first trials as mayor was ensuring citizens’ safety and hiring people with the necessary equipment to clear the heavy snow. Other achievements during his term included restructuring meetings, cutting his own salary and improving ADA accessibility in the town.
Dipierro also finds pride in his daughters, their families and their achievements. Sandy worked for Delta Airlines for 30 years—a job that would eventually lead the entire family to relocate from New Jersey to Georgia. Tragically, she died from cancer in 2016. “Losing her was one of the hardest things I have ever faced,” Dipierro said. Middle daughter Diana became a computer programmer and had two children, Anthony and Kendel. She is married to Robert Moon, a quality control specialist. Youngest daughter Michelle became a court reporter and had one daughter, Dani. She is married to Darren Fairey, a sales manager for Triumph Motorcycles.
In 2017, Hiltrud was diagnosed with lung cancer. She put up a valiant fight and won, but her battle further weakened her lungs. Her COPD developed into emphysema, and she died on June 23, 2024. Diana’s eyes filled with tears as she described her mother’s strength and unwavering support, reflected in the title of Dipierro’s memoir.
“She was the rock of the whole family,” Diana said. “If it wasn’t for her, we wouldn’t be the successful people we are today. She held up everyone. Dad did a lot of things, but Mom was the backbone. Her specialty was being the person you needed in that moment. Sometimes, you needed someone to hug you, and sometimes, you needed someone to say, ‘That’s it. It’s time to move on.’”
Despite dealing with some heart issues, Dipierro still feels strong at 85 and maintains an active lifestyle, attending senior exercise classes twice a week and playing golf regularly. He misses Hiltrud deeply but remains forever grateful for the life they built together.
“If I [leave] anything behind,” Dipierro said, “I hope it is an example of service, of resilience and of devotion to family.”
Joseph Dipierro’s “The Soldier She Made Me” is available on Amazon and Barnes & Noble.
